Haute Mess Award

Cup of Ice has been started more than 3 years ago, but despite the wonderful content that I write, I have not been able to win any awards for myself. Thus being the egoistic guy that I am, I have thought of creating fictitious awards for myself. After all, I send Christmas cards to myself every year.

Ok, crap aside. =p

Nina from ballerina's close to obsession has given me my first ever award.



The Haute Mess Award.

Tracing back to the original source of the award, it was created by Niki B, to commemorate her 100th post in her blog.

More details can be found here.

Quoting from Nina's blog on the reason why she's passing the award to me, "even if yours is not a fashion blogsite, you truly make everyone's day with your lovely (and humorous) insights about life"

Thank you, Nina. That was an excellent complement to begin my day. ^_^

The pre-conditions of this award is to list 7 things I'm grateful for, and to pass it to 7 people.

I will list the former, but I'm sorry that I won't be able to pass the awards on due to some beliefs of my own. Pardon me for being unsporting.

7 things I'm grateful for (in no order of importance)

(1) Wifey. For being the great and irreplacable wife that you are, and for tolerating a unromantic hubby who is full of flaws.

(2) Bloggers of blogs that I frequent. I see the world through your eyes. And reading your updated entries make me happy. ^_^

(3) Readers of Cup of Ice. Thanks for commenting, and not being turned off by my ego. The reason why I keep my Inbox open is to read your comments.

(4) The company I work for, because one should always be grateful to the company who feeds you. That being said, I am still one who believes that one should love the job and never the company, because you won't know when the company will stop loving you.

(5) Malaysia and Singapore. Malaysia is my natural mother, while Singapore is my adopted mother. Despite spending 95% of my life in Singapore, I still feel very rooted to Malaysia. I attribute my down-to-earth character to Malaysia, and my practicality to Singapore. And these 2 attributes define what I am today.

(6) My parents and Wifey's parents. Without the former, there's no me. Without the latter, there's no her.

(7) Myself. The toughest babysitting job in my world is to take charge of myself.

Thanks again, Nina! I will put the award in the side panel for some time, partly because I did not fulfill the entire condition of forwarding this award to a few more people, and because website loading time is always my concern.

About the Author: Shingo T will be creating a "Handsome blogger, but with a little tummy and receding hairline" award, and is looking for nominees.

Year 2009 in review

Alot of bloggers have started rounding off what they have done and not done in year 2009.

Below are some of the main things that happened on my side.

(1) 2009 is the year I gave up my 20-year old gaming addiction, and got to know WrathOfNino, who gave me a great link to a site where fellow recovering gaming addicts shared how their life has been ruined by gaming.

After a few months of hiatus from gaming, I have gone back to do some minor gaming at the encouragement of Wifey, who's still very much a gamer at heart. But this time round, I know I am much better at setting my priorities correct. And spending much much lesser hours at gaming.

I'm a better man.

(2) 2009 marked the year when I first visit Japan. It is the most memorable travel visit I have been to, maybe even more than Europe. The culture there is so different, it really gave me a different insight to human behaviour.

Japn taught me that Man are like monkeys. Have the government set rules, and slowly the rules will inbreed a culture, and slowly their behaviour will change to become a social norm. While Singaporeans may not like the idea of littering being a public offense, but their mindset slowly changed and they got used to it. I don't even litter when I go overseas now, it just feels funny.

(3) 2009 continues to be a mind-opening year for me. In line with my mindset to remain open to ALL kinds of investments and talks, I have attended tons of talks. In the process, I have made new friends, and also rekindled friendships.

Not all talks are meant to cheat your money. I have recently been to a one hour talk where they not just gave me free buffett, but also a S$100 Marina Square voucher with no terms and conditions (other than a 1-year expiry date). And I paid nothing.

Quoting Stuart Chase, an American engineer and economist, this is a VERY true statement.

For those who believe, no proof is necessary.
For those who don't believe, no proof is possible.

(4) 2009 has also been a year which contains the most depressing period of my life. Do me a favour not to ask me what it is, thanks. Even my colleagues were concerned during a period of time when I couldn't smile. I'm glad it's over. But I'm glad it happened too, in a way.

What doesn't kill you should make you stronger.
If it doesn't, you fail at life.

Sorry if it offended anyone, but it's how I was brought up. Nothing will break me.

I make mistakes, I cry, I get over with it.
But I hardly regret, because I can't turn the clock back.

(5) 2009 is the year I started taking those Ba Wang anti-hairfall shampoo. It's pretty embarrassing to admit that my hairline is starting to recede a little. But I'm never one to hide problems, I work on them!

If there's one thing good about being married, it's that I worry less about my outward appearance, and spend more time building on my character.

Alot of people will not agree with my next statement.
Why be single when you can be married?

(6) 2009 is the year when Cup of Ice getting more exposure. Thanks to everyone of you here. Have taken the chance to get to know so many new friends. I shall not give names (for fear of missing anyone important out), but you know who you are.

(7) 2009 is the year I first dreamt about a blogger. In fact, it was just last night. I dreamt that I met with HappySurfer and some other bloggers. And HappySurfer turns out to be a guy (gosh!) in real-life. And she also owns the same cafe where we all met.

Isn't it funny how dreams can be so random?
Gosh, I need to get a life and blog less.

(8) 2009 is the year I started a few health targets for myself. Jan 2009 was the year I had a meat-free month, as a penalty I self-inflict on myself for failing a particular target I set for myself a few years before.

A debt may get mouldy but it never decays.

I have also implemented the "1 good meal a day" target. And also the "no more than 2 sugared drinks a day" target. It's seriously tough to implement such targets for myself in a food paradise country like Singapore, but I'm proud to say they have been STRICTLY followed.

Tough doesn't mean you don't do it.
It just mean you should prove you are tougher than tough.

As Uncle Shingo T grows older, he has to be mindful of his own body. My mouth is willing, but my body is weak. Because of that, my will has to be strong, I can no longer be tempted to consume as and what pleases me.

I need to take care of myself. Failing which, I will be a liability to my Wifey, my family and my finances.

You may not remember what you ate last Friday, but your body remembers them FOREVER.

Looking ahead, I have some rough targets in mind for year 2010. Maybe I will list some of them here. As you know, one way I make sure targets are realised is by telling the WHOLE WORLD about it. Anyway, one lesson I learnt when setting targets, never set too many targets a year. Be focused, set a few but make sure you work on them.

Then you can be tougher than tough, like me.

Random Notes 42

(1) If God kills a bunny everytime you buy a pirated disc, will you still go ahead?

(2) I still have Part 2 and Part 3 waiting to be written about my insight on Network Marketing. There are tons of misconceptions that I wanna clear. I'm not trying to get people into this industry, because this is NOT an easy way to get rich. I'm still wondering if I should write them.

(3) For those of you wondering how I look like in real-life, MKL has revealed a photo of me in his blog that looks something like this (the guy on the right shoving snow).

Thanks for the surprise picture, it did made me chuckle.

(4) While the rest of Europe and the US are freezing cold, I'm craving for snow too, just like Manju.
*Shoutout to Manju*

(5) Wifey and I got a Christmas tree this year, it's something that Wifey always wanted in her very own home. And so we got a 6 inch foot white Christmas tree. I got to admit it's very nice after decoration, despite my earlier protest that the tree will be taking up space in the storeroom for 11 months a year.

(6) Wifey has left 7 presents under the same Christmas tree, all addressed to me, from Santa Claus. Day after day, she's asking me why Santa Claus never bought anything for her. Gosh, 7 presents. Where's "Santa Claus" gonna find so many presents for her?

(7) Most rich people have something in common. They fail much more often than those who are not willing to take risks. And that's why they get the kind of rewards that you and I will never get.

(8) Ever heard about the REAL story of a Singaporean who made millions using $1? No no, it's not me. I'll share the story with you someday.

(9) Well, if all you want for Christmas are your 2 front tooth, go look for Toothfairy. Ya, go spam her blog for your front tooth.

Ok, I'm kidding for the last one.

Money and Us

Is it true that opposites attract?

Well, my Wifey's hobby is to spend money.
And my hobby is to make them.

It's interesting how the 2 of us never have big quarrels when it comes to money.

I'm sure you have heard of the popular gals saying.
"My hubby's money is my money. And my money is still my money."

Being the male chauvinist pig (MCP) that I am, there is no way I will hand the purse to my Wifey. Thus I hold the responsibilities of what to do with our combined savings.

My personal MCP philosophy has always been this.
"Man take charge of the BIG things, and the woman take care of the small things."

Actually, it's not that Wifey can't do big things. But rather, she id not interested to spend time doing finance and investment-related research. She rather do research on our next travel itinery, baking cakes and cookies, and surfing forum for things to shop. And those, are the smaller things in life.

I liked it when she ask me for permission to buy pricey purchases. It makes me feel very in control of our finances. I'm rational enough to determine what are needs and what are wants, which is important because Wifey think everything is a "need". Sigh.

Sometimes I reject her planned purchases, and she starts sulking for the rest of the day. It's a pretty smart tactical move on her end, because sometimes I let her have it her way just to stop her from sulking.

But then, there are also cases when I insist on not buying certain stuffs for her.

Price is what you pay. Value is what you get.

A few years ago, when I started playing the stock market, I made a little money. Being a noob, I started playing bigger and made all the noobish stocks mistakes. And I lost money amounting to 5-digit figures. And I had problem sleeping for 3 nights. I told Wifey of the amount that I lost, expecting her to nag or scold me, like most people's wifes. And her reply? She just said "ok", as if the money meant nothing to her.

In her view, she doesn't care about finances. She leaves me to manage it. It made me very relieved, and blessed to have such a Wifey who doesn't add oil to fire. That really helped me to direct effort to analyse how I should have played stocks differently. A year later, I recovered every single dollar that I lost, and started making some money.

Should Wifey have quarrelled with me over my losses, I might have just gave up on stocks and never made back what I lost.

Behind every successful man, there is a supportive Wifey.

Thank you for trusting me, Wifey.
Love you much much.

Top 10 cruel things that women do to men

I read the following article about the top 10 cruel things that woman do to men, courtesy of Fox News, and could relate to some of them.

I have pasted the article here. Let me know what you think.

Edit: It should be noted that I have nothing against the female species (in fact, I love them), and is well aware that man has their own list of cruel things that they do (think Tiger Woods).

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Call it self-protection or playing the cards right, women have done some nasty things to men to maintain the upper hand and stay in the dating game.

Fox News has compiled a list of top 10 cruel things that women do to men and how they toy with their emotions or ego.

10. Women don't pick up the phone
Men feel good about themselves when they manage to attain a girls’ phone number. However, women don't give it to men that easy afterall. According to Fox News, they often give men a fake number or don't pick up their calls.

9. Use men for free drinks
Fox News also suggested that there are women who go out never planning to spend any of their own money on drinks at the bar or club. Instead, they deploy their feminine ruses to convince guys to shell out for their night's libations.

While some of them might begin to get to know him, Fox News states that the cruel and heartless ones will take that drink, flirt a little and move on.

8. Use men as placeholders
Some women keep men close by for company's sake. The American news network reported that if the women is a decent person, she will just get it over with and dump the guy, but if she's cruel, she'll hold on to him until somebody new comes along.

According to the same source, women like that don't like to be alone and without a relationship, so instead of putting men out of their misery and ending the relationship or fling, she will string him along until she finds a replacement.

7. Emotionally manipulate men
Men don't like to see women cry and some cruel women take advantage of the fact to get what they want. A few threatening tears could easily make men do anything for the woman to get it to stop.

6. Use physical violence
Fox News also reported that while men who hit women are often deemed nasty, there are also some cruel women who feel it is perfectly acceptable to hit their boyfriends, as he would never hit her back. This type of woman feels like she can inflict any kind physical pain on him without fear of repercussion.

5. Ridicule men in public
Cruel women criticize and humiliate their men in public places. They often poke fun at her man or even soundly discredit him in front of others.

4. Women don't disclose their relationship status
While it is not the worst thing a woman could do to a man, but it is annoying that she leads men to think that she is available so that she can enjoy the man's flirtation and flattery when she is already attached.

3. Women withhold sex
According to Fox News, this is a time-tested, and frequently used, cruel thing for women to do to men. For most men, sex is as important as breathing, so withholding it in order to get something she wants or simply to punish him for his wrongdoings is an awful thing to do, albeit effective.

2. Women put men to the test
Imagine this scenario. It's a boys night out, but your girlfriend calls and asks you to ditch them to be with her instead.

She does not have any particular reason for her request; she claims she just wants to see you. She knows very well that you have already made plans with the guys, but if you really loved her, you'd go over to her place instead.

Fox News reported that if her request comes with the "if you really loved me" trump card, then it is a test. If you choose anything other than immediately rushing to her side, you fail. This kind of testing in a relationship is indeed emotionally cruel and petty.

1. Women flirt to inspire jealousy
Maybe she's feeling under-appreciated, maybe you've just had a big fight or maybe she just enjoys the tortured look on your face.

For whatever reason, girls who flirt with other guys in front of their boyfriends are immature and manipulative, said Fox News.

More wise words from Mum

As you may know, my mum has been a huge influence in my life since young. She has always been very concerned about me and my sister. Juggling between factory work, house chores, current affairs, community centre activities and spending time with her kids, she slept little and live alot.

Dad was never such an influence, as he was more quiet, and kept more to himself reading newspapers and watching TV. I never blamed him, as his work was very physical exhausting. Be it being an Electrician, a truck Driver, or furniture Mover, it's more physcally demanding to the office job many of us hold.

Today, I shall share one of the interesting things that my mum taught me.

If you want to commit suicide, make sure you die. Don't end up being handicapped and be a liability to those who love you.

The statement was made after she read a newspaper article about someone who survived a suicide. But the meaning is clear and can be extended to other areas of your life.

Some decisions in life has a ripple effect.

If you smoke, it's ok if you die early, but you are also dragging your close family to the grave early with the 2nd hand smoke.

If you gamble excessively and borrow money from loan shark, it's ok if you get chopped to 20 pieces, but don't cause emotional scars to your loved ones and the young ones.

But of course, if you can, don't smoke and gamble, and don't go suicide.

What you do today will impact you and everyone around you tomorrow.

Somehow, the United Nation Climate Summit comes to mind. Everyone has their own selfish agendas, but eventually it's the world that suffers.

Stupidity never exist.

From young, my mum has taught me never to call anyone "stupid".

She was a good role model, using words 可爱 (cute) as a substitute. When she's upset at the things I do, she will ask "为什么你这么可爱?" (why are you so cute?)

My young fragile heart was never shattered when she used such a mild word. It helped me alot as I spend more time improving myself after she say that, as opposed to getting upset over the remarks and being counter-productive.

Growing up, I took offense when people call others "stupid". If you are unaware why a person does not understand something you said, it doesn't mean they are "stupid", it only means that you have overrated your explanation.

That's why when colleagues ask me if they can ask me a "stupid question", I always reply that there's no such thing called a stupid question.

And many of these "stupid" questions ended up being interesting questions that challenge my thinking. After all, no one thinks too much about stuffs that appear very simple, and that's why issues will arrive.

There are silly people, simple people, ignorant people, insensitive people, disabled people and innocent people.

But none of them are stupid.

About the Author: Shingo T doesn't think George Bush is stupid, he's just insensitive to the people's needs.